Now I know what you’re thinking…..but the “B” word I’m talking about is BUSY!
I’m kicking “I’m too busy” and “I’m so busy” to the curb!
Thinking back I can remember a time in my life when I believed that my happiness revolved around how busy I was. If I wasn’t busy….something had to be wrong with me. And I had equated and perfected in my mind that if I was busy, I was using my time wisely. At the end of the day, it was purely a validation thing for me….and proving to myself that I was valuable. I had the mindset that the busier I was, the more successful I would be, and any threat to my productivity was letting myself down.
Okay…fast forward…..
With age comes knowledge! (Better with age…just like wine)
Being busy did not add an ounce of happiness. I remember a friend saying to me, “Amy, you are never home. You are so busy all the time.”
“I didn’t want to realize it, or dare to say it out loud, but I was scared. I was afraid to admit that if I slowed down and took a moment, I would see myself.” I remember writing that statement in my book, and right after I finished writing it, I took a deep breath, and realized how far I’d come..and how much I had learned on this crazy adventure we call life.
You don’t earn a badge of honor for being too busy.
Most of us are fairly defensive when it comes to our ‘busyness.’ Heck, we have goals to accomplish, promotions to earn, workouts to master, money to make, and debts to eliminate, but along with all that, the most important part is hopefully helping and inspiring others. Carving out time for that is on my priority list.
As women we have mastered multi-tasking. If we can talk on the phone, clean the kitchen, and fold laundry at the same time…we are crazy masterful….or are we?
Let’s be honest – have you ever joined a class or read a book about ‘how to get more done?”….what are we thinking? I think we can all attest to the fact that we don’t need more to do.
Our to do lists are quite lengthy already.
Did you realize that 80% of the country thinks they will one day become rich, but in reality less than 10% actually will? I’m not sure those odds are in our favor?
I had an interesting conversation last week with an amazing woman (Spoiler Alert – She is an upcoming guest for my podcast. We talked about this very thing. “BUSYNESS” and what it will look like now that we’re coming out of a pandemic….something that forced us to stay home more, be more present, and slow our cadence.
Picture this for a moment.
You run into an acquaintance at a local coffeeshop. She sees you, and immediately asks, “How are you?”
You replay, “Oh, I’m fine. I’m so busy. I am getting my son ready for college, and my daughter just started playing on a travel team. I am heading up a committee..blah, blah, blah…….okay…you get the point….
As you leave the coffee shop…you are off to your next thing on the to do list….off to the races is the common saying.
Now let’s replay this a bit….you meet an acquaintance in the coffee shop and she asks, “How are you?”
You take a deep breath and on the exhale say, “I’m great. This past year really made me appreciate being present, and enjoying more time outside. I have slowed my cadence and decided to step away from a few of the commitment I had made. I’m walking 3 miles everyday.”
Okay…let’s be honest – with that scenario…..the friend probably didn’t make it to her car before texting a slew a friends…..saying…”I just saw ____. She’s not busy. She stepped down from the PTA, and is actually taking walks everyday….something must be wrong…….Is she sick? Is she getting divorced? Did her kids drop out of school? What’s going on?
I know – that may be dramatic – but there’s some truth too….we tend to spin our wheels, or what I like to say, “get on this
hamster wheel” which doesn’t allow us to breathe.
I started this post by saying I’m eliminating the “B” word….and I’m sticking to it. I’m not saying we shouldn’t pursue our goals and dreams, and not suggesting we shouldn’t work hard..but reflect on a few things before you jump into “YES” mode…
What do I want to accomplish?
What will I do today that supports what I’m passionate about?
Live in the moment…savor the little things….and try not to say, “I’m too busy”.
I can’t wait to hear if you can shift the narrative, and eliminate or decrease the “B” word in your life?
Who is getting ready to travel again? Think Fall, 2021….and then picture yourself surrounded by sand and sun – making connections…having conversations and celebrating women!
Are your ready to travel with friends…..ones you know and the ones you’ll meet along the way?
You read the description and think to yourself, “I’m In” and then that second guessing starts, and you feel anxious and nervous about flying to Miami to join a group of women, most of them will be strangers….but then something incredible happens.
You do it! You take the leap or you have that CANNONBALL moment. You call or text your closest girlfriends and say, “Are you ready for an adventure?” “Pack your bags…we are going.”
After a tumultuous year, and lots of staying home time, we have learned, and research shows that connectivity to other people is a part of the fabric of our well-being.
Not many women, at least the sensible ones will convince themselves of not going on an incredible weekend away to discover their sense of self…and leave inspired.
Are you beginning to think this is sounding like something you could really use in your life?
But then….you deep dive…that introvert sets in….realizing you’re okay with your own company – and you starting thinking, what will it be like meeting other women that I don’t even know? Let’s be honest, we think about these things as women…..maybe you’re the one that always feels awkward at parties…or is the one always working at an event to avoid the dance floor, and small talks makes you nervous. That’s okay…..
As women, we’re natural caregivers and instinctively put others’ needs first. But, only by stepping back to focus on our own physical and mental health, we can gain a sense of clarity, and can truly be at our best for those we love.
So when you hear about the location…..Miami…surrounded by sun and sand and listening to incredible speakers that will challenge you…..or sitting in a workshop that allows you to grow in a way you never knew possible, or sitting on the beach with other women sharing experiences and stories that will challenge you….now that sounds exhilarating – doesn’t it?
Now imagine this….
What would it feel like to just let go? Let go of judging yourself…..Letting go at a time of transition, not knowing what’s next? Letting go of telling yourself you’re not good enough, or smart enough, or strong enough….What would it be like to be as kind to yourself as you are to other people?
That’s what will happen this weekend! You will be your guest of honor!
When women get together – magic happens. Connections are made and friendships are formed. A community is built.
Research indicates that there has been a significant uptick on Google Trend Reports, around searching women and self care, or women and travel. There’s a reason for that – we are missing connections. We are missing hugs, and human interaction in person….not virtual. It is proven that connection leads to a boost of oxytocin, the happiness hormone that helps make us kinder, more giving, and more trusting. Contrarily, those who don’t have strong friendships or connections, are more prone to feelings of depression and cognitive decline.
Save the date…..November 5-7th in Miami. Links will be sent in the next two weeks to register. It will also include details about speakers and workshops……So don’t overthink it….underthink it and CANNONBALL into the weekend with confidence of knowing you’ll leave inspired and refreshed.
It will be a time to celebrate you! It will be a time to find some stillness and peace in chaos. The last year has been so challenging – with so much uncertainty and sadness.
Come alone, bring your bestie, or come as a group of girlfriends, and make sure to pack your bags with the intention of making new friends.
Comment below….or send me an email: amy@fearlesslyfacingfifty.com and say I”M IN to get on the mailing list!
Now go forth and be awesome!
